
A six step process...
I well remember the first time I was "corrected" by a manager. I was a young bank clerk and had received a transaction that was incorrect, from a much more senior person (a manager) in another branch of the bank. I sent the transaction back with a note asking for it to be corrected. Next thing I hear was my own manager shouting at me from his office.
Apparently, I had upset his "good colleague" and I must now go and apologise in person! There was no discussion as to whether I was right or wrong about either the transaction or what I did – just "Go immediately and apologise!" I decided then and there that when I got to be a manager and had to correct someone, I would treat my staff quite differently.
As managers, we all have to give feedback from time to time that we consider to be "bad news" for the employee. Do you dread the times when you have to do this? Or perhaps, you handle the situation ok, but the employee's performance does not seem to improve as a result of your counselling"?
The most common mistake we make is combining bad news with good news. "Andrew, I've been impressed with the way you handle the planning, time lines and follow up systems for your projects. But, along the way, you seem to develop poor relationships with some of the key stakeholders. As a result, many of the projects are less successful than they should be." On the surface, this sounds like a reasonable feedback message from the manager. Will Andrew accept the feedback and will it lead to a rational discussion of how he might improve his stakeholder relationships?
No. There are two reasons why this conversation is likely to become negative rather than positive. Firstly, when mixing "good" and "bad" news, people are more likely to hear only the good news. The bad news, if heard appears as a minor blimp on their performance. In other words, "everything is basically ok with me".
Secondly, when they do actually hear the bad news it is nearly always because the word "but" has been used to bridge the good and the bad. Using "but" will invariably promote a negative reaction from the employee and the conversation will generate into a downward spiral of argument and counter argument.
Above all, listen, listen, listen! And be prepared to discuss the employee's suggestions for how he/she intends to solve the problem. My experience has been that often the employee will come up with a better solution than you had first thought of. Most importantly, because it is their suggestion, they will have commitment for its implementation.
© The National Learning Institute

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